stuck on "starting game..."

Honestly I'd run Ping plotter or something similar to get a good detailed report of your connection to/from the server. I'd say try logging into the server when none of your friends are on, but if it was the server not able to handle one more person it wouldn't just do this to you. Try a couple other random servers/run ping plotter to isolate the issue a bit more. A good ping doesn't mean it's a good connection, you could be dropping packets like hot potatoes.

 
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